Pet Parent: Love, Grief, and the Evolving Human-Animal Bond

"Pet Parent": Love or Trend?

The expression "pet parent" often generates debate, but for the interviewees and Livia, it is a profound reality. Natalia Nigro, a psychologist, explains that the term is unsettling because it challenges the traditional logic of family structure. Based on psychoanalysis, parenting is defined as a set of care, protection, and affection that goes far beyond the biological aspect. Why not extend this set of feelings and actions to a being of another species?

Women, historically socialized for caregiving, find in pets a way to express this parenting, whether with nieces, nephews, friends, or animals. The protective instinct and the capacity to nurture and love manifest in various ways, and love for a pet is one of them. For many women who choose not to have children, pets take on a central role, loved and cared for as if they were their own children.

Balance and Well-being: Where is the Limit?

The discussion about what is "normal" or "healthy" in the relationship with pets is complex. The guests emphasize that the benchmark is the well-being of both the guardian and the animal. Services like pet daycare and swimming, which some might consider excessive, are actually important for the socialization and energy expenditure of animals, especially in apartments. The problem arises when excessive humanization ignores the specific needs of the species.

It's crucial to remember that "a dog is a dog, a person is a person", meaning their needs are different. Painting a pet's fur, for example, might be questionable, but if it doesn't harm the animal and doesn't negatively impact anyone else's life, it's a personal choice. The maxim is: if it doesn't harm the pet or other people, then it's valid.

Hyper-bonding: Excessive Love or Need?

The term hyper-bonding, common in veterinary medicine, refers to separation anxiety that is a two-way street between guardian and pet. Both can develop emotional dependency that negatively impacts their social lives. To avoid hyper-bonding and seek balance, it is fundamental to respect the species and its needs. Often, the issue is more related to the guardian than the pet, requiring "human training," sometimes with the aid of therapy.

Benefits of Pets and Market Growth

Pets bring happiness at all stages of life. In childhood, they promote responsibility and empathy. In adolescence, they offer a safe refuge. In adulthood, they bring routine and purpose. For the elderly, they provide companionship and stimulate mobility. The unconditional love and loyalty of pets are benefits they offer without asking for anything in return.

This deepening bond has propelled the pet market, which today moves billions. The growth is not merely consumerism but a response to the demand for increasingly specialized care: from natural foods to state-of-the-art veterinary clinics, including treatments like tartar removal, once inconceivable. The industry evolves to meet the new needs of a being now seen as part of the family.

Grieving a Pet: The Invisible Pain and Laica Funeral Pet

Dealing with the loss of a pet is one of the most difficult experiences for a guardian. This is where Laica Pet Funeral Assistance, co-founded by Natalia and Raquel, comes in. Laica was born from the founders' own need to find support when they lost their pets. The company offers comfort and cremation services for dogs, cats, birds, hamsters, and other small to medium-sized animals, ensuring dignified treatment of the animal's body.

It's important to know that burying a pet in common ground is an environmental crime, with high fines. Individual cremation is a clean and ecological solution. For the ashes, options exist such as jewelry, diamonds, or Laica's mini planting kit, which allows the guardian to plant a seed with the ashes, symbolizing the continuity of life and the renewal of a cycle. This therapeutic ritual aids in grief processing.

Disenfranchised Grief

Grief over a pet is often disenfranchised grief. Society tends to invisibilize this pain, with phrases like "it's just a dog" or "you'll get another one soon." This invalidates the guardian's suffering, which can be as intense and long-lasting as the loss of a human family member, leading to depression and profound sadness. Natalia and Raquel highlight that the first step towards support is precisely to validate this pain. Fortunately, some companies are already beginning to offer bereavement leave for pet loss, recognizing the impact this experience has on employees.

Myths and Truths About Our Companions (Voice in Play)

Livia Matos proposes a game of myths and truths with the guests, unraveling some common beliefs:

• Do dogs only see in black and white? Myth. They see colors like blue and recognize other animals on TV, as demonstrated by the guests' pets.
• Do cats always land on their feet? Myth. While they have a tendency to do so, accidents happen, and it's crucial to screen windows to prevent falls.
• Can a dog sense when its guardian is sad? Truth. They are extremely sensitive and offer comfort, staying by their humans' side.
• Are excessive baths bad for pets? Truth. Very frequent baths can remove the skin's protective barrier, increasing the risk of allergies and dermatological problems.
• Do cats not bond with their owners, only with the house? Myth. Cats develop deep bonds with their guardians, not just with their environment.
• Does having a pet help reduce stress and anxiety? Truth. This is scientifically proven, as interaction with animals releases well-being hormones.
• Does grief only exist when a close person dies? Myth. Many types of grief exist, and the loss of a pet is one of them.
• Is feeling pain for a lost pet, relationship, or job an overreaction? Myth. All these losses can generate genuine grief and pain, which need to be validated.

Essential Advice for Guardians

For those considering adopting a pet, the main tip is: have love and responsibility. A pet is not a toy or a gift, but a choice that demands a commitment of 13 to 15 years. It is fundamental that all household members agree and are aware of the challenges. Beyond affection, it's necessary to have financial resources to cover quality food, vaccinations, veterinary consultations, medications, and hygiene. A pet is a living being that bonds and feels, and abandoning it will cause suffering. The pandemic, for example, saw an increase in adoptions and, subsequently, in abandonments.

For all pet parents, the final message is clear: what you feel, your bond, and affection with your pet are real, true, just, and valid. As long as you and your pet are well, with the species' needs met, enjoy every moment. The time with them is short, but the love remains forever. Don't worry about what others say; celebrate this love that fulfills and transforms life.